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Not Another Lonely Christmas Page 4


  Chapter Six

  The messages don’t stop coming through, I try keeping up but I’m struggling. Some I get carried away reading, they sound like dreams come true if I were to accept a date with them. Others are cheap copies of each other.

  There must be over a thousand requests to take me to dinner. The love of my life could be one of them, it worried me at first that I could miss meeting them because I’m looking for more than a standard dinner at a half decent restaurant, then I looked in the mirror and saw I deserved more thought and effort. Dinners are standard, eating being a part of every day life. I crave the moments that only happen once in a lifetime.

  The only repetitive occurrence I prefer in my life is walking into my local pub, the Dark Swan. Tonight, I need a large red wine and a large dose of normalcy. I walk in and the heater blows its warm air all around me. As I’m on my own I sit at the bar and settle in, taking my coat off.

  I’ve barely ordered a drink when I’m joined by an attractive guy, who I guess to be in his thirties. His head is shaved close to his scalp and his eyes are dark, the darkest I’ve ever seen.

  “Can I get you a drink?”

  The wine I ordered arrives and I hold it up in answer.

  “Thanks, but no thanks.”

  “Maybe I can get the next one?” he asks, sitting on the stool beside mine.

  “Are you from around here?”

  I nod, keeping my mouth shut. He takes it as a cue to ask more questions. How old am I? Do I live nearby? Am I single? I entertain him for a while, and then I ask my own questions.

  “I drink here frequently, and I don’t recognise you, where are you from?”

  His suit is nice but it’s easy to tell he’s been wearing it for a lot of hours. Fatigue darkens his under eyes and he stinks of corporate something.

  “I’m currently living in Cambridge, I’m here for work.”

  “And what is it you do? Actually, I don’t need to know and I’m sure you don’t want to talk about it, if you’re here to drown in alcohol.”

  “You’re not wrong, the last thing I want to do is talk about work.”

  Leaning away slightly, I ask my next question expecting the answer he gives.

  “What is it you want to do?” I ask and then he leans over and says, “You.”

  Finishing my drink, I slam the glass down a little harder than necessary and slip off my stool.

  “Don’t tell me, we’d go back to my place, we’d get down to business, you’d tell me how good I felt, how great I was, we’ll definitely do it again the next time you’re around all the while getting your clothes back on while I lie in bed, and then we’d never see each other again. But I wouldn’t have a great time because you’d leave me unsatisfied. I have no doubt about that.”

  There he has it, the rest of the night all laid out for him and he doesn’t even have to leave the warm pub.

  Shoving my coat on, I turn my back on Harry or Harvey, or whatever his name was, and my breath is stolen from me. It feels like my lungs are trapped in an airless box and I don’t have a key to unlock it.

  I’m hoping it’s not the wine messing with my sight because I swear, the most beautiful man I’ve seen has just walked in and he’s looking straight at me, his stone coloured eyes boring into mine.

  Warmth hits my shoulder and I break eye contact with the newcomer to see where it’s coming from.

  Harry or Harvey stands behind me and the new guy joins the two guys he came in with. I can feel his eyes on me as I step away from my new friend who I plan on never seeing again.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to come back to my hotel? I promise to…” He leans in and the stench of whiskey envelopes me. “Sort you out first.”

  “Wow, how can I refuse an offer like that?” I mutter, and head for the door.

  “Your loss,” he calls out behind me.

  “How will I survive?” I sarcastically whisper under my breath stepping outside.

  “I’m sure you’ll be fine.”

  I spin around, forgetting all about buttoning my coat up. Stone eyes is standing on the threshold and he literally fills the doorway.

  He flicks a cigarette around between his fingers. Everything about him is alluring and it’s drawing me in.

  “Yes, I will be fine.”

  Dragging my eyes away from him, I’m lightheaded from the wine and I won’t tarnish my good decision-making knocking back the guy inside by making a bad decision with this gorgeous stranger.

  Neither of us say another word as I walk up the street heading for home, but I feel him watching me until I turn the corner.

  Chapter Seven

  ‘I’ve caught the sick bug my foster family have, I won’t be able to meet you today. ☹’

  My first instinct is to go to Casey. One time she was sick, her foster family didn’t care, they didn’t even know she had left the house and wondered to the salon. She was eleven and they simply didn’t care for her.

  ‘Do you need anything? I can be at yours in half an hour.’

  Her reply comes fast, and it takes the pressure away knowing she wouldn’t be texting if she were bad.

  ‘I’m fine, the FM (Foster Mother) is looking after me for once. Make sure Gabriella posts the date soon as and I can watch.’

  ‘Let me know if you do need anything.’

  Making sure my phone volume is on high, I put it away in my bag and seek out Ross Walker in his busking spot. He’s not ugly in the slightest but if I’m being honest, I’m not drawn to him like a moth to a flame like I was last night with the guy from the pub.

  His dark hair falls around his face and I itch to tuck it behind his ears where his beanie hat sits snugly. His dark eyes nervously fall on me and then he looks away and fiddles with the equipment surrounding him. When I was younger, there was a guy who stood on the high street I passed on the way to school and he would busk, but he only had his voice and a guitar. Ross has a guitar, a mic, and some electronic stuff. It looks like a mini studio but outside on the street.

  “Should I go talk to him?” I whisper to Gabs.

  Michael is hanging back on the steps, lighting a cigarette and blowing it into the air. Gabs frowns at him and I leave it alone. They’re not my business and I’m not one to judge anyone for smoking.

  I return my attention to Ross and I walk over but hang back from his things. I don’t want to break anything, it all looks so expensive.

  “Hi, it’s nice to meet you,” I smile, and it seems to put him at ease.

  “Hey, I’m glad you could come out tonight. I couldn’t quite believe you responded to my message.”

  His message promised he had the most romantic song for me that he had personally written himself.

  “At the moment, I’m open to anything. I can’t wait to hear what you’ve written. I’m excited.”

  His nerves return and it’s cute how he wears his emotions so clearly for all to see.

  “I hope you like it,” he returns, and I hope his singing voice is as smooth as his speaking voice.

  “Where shall I stand?”

  “Wherever you like,” he beams, and I enjoy watching his confidence grow.

  There isn’t much of a crowd but by the time the music starts up, people are starting to linger around.

  I lean against the rails and wait to be swept off my feet. Gabriella swings the phone my way and smiling, I wave at the camera before she turns it to Ross.

  “This is a song I wrote yesterday for a girl who is seeking something that doesn’t exist. She’s a fool, and she’ll be left in the cold and lonely if she waits for the perfect one to romance her this Christmas.”

  What? His nerves are long gone, venom running through him instead and it pours from him in droves.

  Michael rises from the steps he was sitting on and Gabriella moves closer beside me. Ross strokes the guitar strings a few times and leans in towards the mic.

  “There was a girl, and her smile was fake.

  She was looking for something she cou
ldn’t shake.

  The slow beat picks up and his fingers strum faster over the strings.

  She opened her legs and was used like a cheap whore.

  Her tears came, just after she did…”

  Pushing away from the rail, I can’t listen to anymore. He didn’t want me here to try and romance me, he wanted exposure and to humiliate me in doing so.

  How did I just find him attractive? I’m so happy Casey isn’t here to see this for herself. She’ll watch it online but it’s different seeing it happen in person.

  “Who the hell does this twat think he is?” Gabs snaps.

  “Who is this prick?” Michael asks, coming over to us.

  His jaw is tight and the vein in his temple is looking rather angry. Ross continues his song of insults and I block out the murmurings starting up around us.

  “I should teach him a lesson,” he growls, but it’s Gabs who steps forward.

  She passes Michael her phone and tells him to keep filming her. She loosens her scarf and rolls her neck.

  “I’ve got this.”

  I should be defending myself, but all I do is stand frozen in awe of her. We can only see the back of her head, but we sure can see Ross’s face and he stutters his brutal lyrics as he watches my friend strut towards him. He’s wary and he should be. Gabriella doesn’t hold prisoners and she is fiercely loyal to me, the only person in my life to give a damn whether I’m used, hurt, humiliated, she’s always there for the good and for the bad.

  The music fades and a shrill squeal comes from the microphone as she yanks it off its stand. Ross’s arm shoots out to snatch it back, but he’s not fast enough.

  “How many of you think this guy is funny for disrespecting a woman?” she says, and her voice rings out louder than I was expecting. “How many of you would let him embarrass you in public like this especially when you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong?”

  Oh god. The crowd is turning, and Gabs has their full attention.

  “This man lured my friend here under false expectations to make her happy and then tried his best to humiliate her.”

  She turns back to him and he’s slowly retreating but the shop window stops him from going any further.

  “Why would you do that to her?” she questions him. “Why? Do you hate women or something? I mean, she’s done nothing to you and you hate on her without even knowing her.”

  His mouth open and closes numerous times and still nothing comes out to defend himself.

  “Yeah, do you get off treating women this way?” a lady from the other side of the crowd yells and then chaos breaks out.

  They move in around Ross and Michael doesn’t waste a second going to get Gabriella out of there.

  I don’t quite believe what’s just happened, and I’ve lost sight of my friends but I’m feeling good.

  I would feel sorry for Ross being bombarded by this crowd, but I don’t, there are always consequences for your actions and these are his. The crowd parts and Michael’s ushering Gabs towards me. Her eyes are wild, she’s rushing and before I can say a word, she is jumping on me. We fall back onto the rails and her squeals deafen me.

  “Michael better have got all that on camera, I’m posting that everywhere.”

  “We’ve got to get out of here first, you’ve just caused an uprising,” Michael grunts, nudging us both to start walking.

  She takes her phone back as we disappear around the corner and out of sight and laughs at the phone. I hide behind Michael when she points the thing at me and she laughs even harder.

  “That was unbelievable, the nerve of him, honestly, Rem. I’m sorry if I embarrassed you, but I couldn’t let him get away with him treating you like that.”

  “He’s lucky I didn’t knock him on his arse,” Michael warns, and I smile.

  “I’m lucky you two are my friends and thank you for coming along when I know you’d rather be anywhere else,” I say to him.

  “Don’t go getting soft on me, Humphrey. Let’s go to the pub and get slaughtered.”

  “Sounds like a good bloody plan, and dare anyone who tries to use you,” Gabriella hollers.

  Shaking my head, I link my arm through hers and we set off for an afternoon of drinks and friendship.

  Perhaps I’m only destined to have solid friendships, and not relationships. I’m starting to believe I’ll never know. Then again, the stranger from last night might be there and who knows what could happen.

  Michael drives us home and parks up outside Gabriella’s door to her flat above an estate agent shop and all three of us cross the road and walk in the Dark Swan. Michael goes to the bar and Gabs and I automatically go to our usual table in the corner.

  My eyes roam the pub from where I sit, and the guy isn’t here. After Ross’s attempt to bring me down, the mysterious guy would have been a welcome distraction.

  “There, the video is posted.”

  Gabriella is tapping away on her phone and I gladly accept the large red wine Michael places in front of me.

  He returns to the bar and I’ve nearly finished my wine before he returns with shots.

  “I shouldn’t, but one won’t hurt,” I smile, taking one of the green shots.

  I neck it back in one go and I’m interrupted by my phone ringing. It’s Casey and I quickly answer.

  “I can’t believe he did that to you, are you okay?” Is the first thing she says.

  “I’m fine, Case. If you watched the whole thing, you would have seen Gabriella defend my honour.”

  “Damn right,” Gabs mutters under her breath.

  “I did, and she’s always been cool.”

  “Hey, am I not?”

  Her laugh is strained, and I remember she’s caught her foster family’s sickness bug.

  “How are you feeling?” I ask, completely turning the conversation on her.

  “I feel like crap, I swear, I can’t wait till I live alone like you. I won’t catch anything then.”

  I half smile because having your own space is exciting, it soon wears off when the loneliness sets in.

  “Are you sure you don’t need me to bring you anything?”

  “I’m sure, Maggie is actually checking on me and making sure I sip water and try to eat some dry toast. She’s almost being nice,” she chuckles but the sadness is clear to me.

  “Get some rest and don’t worry about me, text me tomorrow and let me know how you’re doing. Promise?”

  “I promise.”

  She hangs up and Gabriella is eager to read me some of the comments already pouring in on her video. Finishing my wine, I drink my courage and settle in.

  Chapter Eight

  Gabriella couldn’t wait to post the video clip of Ross Walker and his love song of hate. Since I’ve been home, I’ve watched it countless times. Gabriella was on fire and the comments are hailing her as my hero. Everyone wanting her to be their friends, wanting to have someone loyal in their lives. I press play on the clip again and thank the heavens she is my friend and god, I love the bones off her.

  The wind whistles and howls outside and lashes against my window in the silence once the video is finished and I pull the covers further up. I’ve come to learn the idea of being romanced is much easier to play out in my mind, or in a movie and even in the books I read. In reality, it’s not so clear cut. I click on one message from a guy called Freddie, he looks like someone who plays rugby and it’s confirmed he does when I snoop on his page. He promises he’ll show me a time I will never forget, but I’m not so quick to jump in and message him back.

  Another message from someone called Marlon wants to show me the world and apparently, when he wins the twenty thousand pounds, we’ll be able to use it to travel Asia because I’ll have fallen in love with him and won’t be able to live without him.

  I bypass his offer and click on a message from an older gentleman. This guy has charm, even in his words on a phone screen and only one promise that if I’m not romanced, he’ll donate ten thousand pounds to a charity of my choice.
Brody Wright has intrigued me, and I write him back.

  ‘Hi, your message has peaked my interest. If you would still like to meet, let me know a time and a place and we’ll see who will be paying out at the end.’

  My heart skips a beat when a notification comes through that he’s read it already and I watch the little ticker to signal he’s replying. He does not hang around.

  ‘Can you do tomorrow? If so, I will send a car to pick you up at four o’clock.’

  * * *

  ‘Tomorrow is fine, I will send you my address tomorrow lunchtime. What do have in mind for our date?’

  * * *

  ‘All will be revealed when we meet. I look forward to meeting you. Bring your passport.’

  * * *

  ‘Where in the world? I need to know if I’m leaving the country.’

  * * *

  ‘I don’t want to ruin the surprise but it’s only a very short flight, you won’t be disappointed.’

  * * *

  “You remember my friend comes along too, I don’t go anywhere without her.’

  * * *

  “That’s fine.’

  He goes offline, and I log out of Flipped for the night. I dial Gab’s number and it rings out to voicemail. I’m halfway through typing out a message when she calls me back and she sounds off.

  “Were you asleep?” I ask.

  “No-no, I was just, um, in the bath.”

  Okay, if she doesn’t want to say, I can guess she’s with Michael, but I won’t say anything. She’s obviously not ready to go public with him.